Thursday, April 28, 2011

Using SEX right

Today’s blog will be about - no, not prostitution - but the controversy about SEX and selling it to the public. It’s been close to my heart to address this important (and all so present) problem in Hollywood for quite some time now, so here it is.


Fact is: Sex is, and will probably always be, the most wonderful thing in the world. We can all agree on that, right? Not just because it burns calories faster than any fitness studio or lifts us into hormone heaven, but because it’s an adventure! It takes us away, creates shelter; even helps us escaping from our mostly boring days. We feel FREE.


Unfortunately we’re not the only ones in the know, but have to share that wisdom with people who make their living with manipulation: the media. Oh and how they exploit it! But it seems like I’m not the only one being annoyed by the flood of photoshopped bodies. Placed in almost every music video, commercial, film, and TV show (not even subtle!) the creators seem to forget that not everyone IS sexy.


The reason why most of the media’s forceful attempts fail is: They haven’t been done right! Not everyone is turned on by anorexic teenagers posing as if they knew what sex appeal is. A photoshopped poster of plastic faces doesn’t do it for me either. Nor do bodies that seem to go through fitness torture on a daily basis. What's important for me is that the performer is comfortable with himself and enjoys it. Not everyone is. Please don’t over saturate us with painfully forced porn pictures! It takes away the pleasure and has the opposite effect - it commercializes sex.


The same goes for upcoming young directors who mistake a half naked scene in their amateur short film for a sexual experience. It’s just not the same. I do understand the problem of not getting laid, but lots of skin has and will never make up for a crappy story. Trust me - it has been tried before.


America of course has its own issues with sex- especially in comparison with the rest of the world that wasn’t founded by puritans. If only the conflict of ‘selling sex’ and ‘somehow holding on to treating it respectfully’ would finally come together in a satisfying compromise. The contradictions have been going on long enough. Make sex a healthy and a beautiful thing again! Otherwise the porn industry will continue to define it, and create an entire breakdown of gender communication.


Porn, the epitome of selfish pleasure (masculine that usually is), seems to be the last manly resort in today’s isolation. Unfortunately all it does is portraying women in an funny way and planting images in men’s head that create a bizarre expectation. Not to mention how it demystifies the act of love and makes it an act of sex. Shouldn’t sex actually be sensual, about a connection and love? As far as I’m concerned its very definition is seduction, playfulness, connection and passion- not a technique.


Something else I’ve especially noticed in the states is that recent shifts, changes and modernizations have created chaos - followed by confusion. Men here are desperate because women have been taught to be hard to get. The women on the other hand, tease men (with the shortest dresses I’ve ever seen) but they need at least five paid for dates (a very American concept) to be won over. Wow - that sounds like a lot of work before you even get to check if you’re sexually compatible! Why being so difficult and resist natural desire?


I mean: We do live longer, but I certainly don't want to waste my time with someone who never French kissed before! Am I wrong? And I'm not talking about sleeping with any man I’ve met ten minutes ago, but acknowledging a heavy flirtation and allowing it to lead into a one night adventure if it presents itself?!


American women often even ban sex completely because their upbringing caused a ‘princess syndrome’ making them believe, they’re too good for any man (supposedly caused by the last generation of single mothers & their disappointment in the father of their children). I don't think that's fair... That can't be good for anyone. Plus: It creates a huge distant and makes the men look bad. There will always be insecurities in relationships but it’s all a matter of communication! 

a sexy attempt
Sex is power- but it shouldn’t be ‘overpowering the opposite sex’, neither exploiting the female sexuality. I vote for “making love” to come back in fashion!!! Here’s my sexy picture I took while seducing, gaming and falling into passion with the man behind the camera.





Your SexyNista.

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